Our culture and media have given us an image of what a meaningful relationship is. No, I'm not talking about the sex-driven shallowness that we see on the surface. I'm talking about the feel-good heart-warming movies and stories. The growing-old together stories. The Notebook. Twilight. Anything with Hugh Grant. The ones where you fall completely in love and have a lifetime of emotional loveliness. Yes, there are fights and hard times and pain and stress, but every night, you and the love of your life will make up and look at each other, knowing the other person is the most wonderful person in the world and you pray that you will never be driven apart. THIS has been the concept that has been driven into my mind like a railroad spike. And I'm starting to somewhat doubt it.
Is this what you've been thinking, baby boo?
"For sure, I wish with all my being for that to be the case. But lately I've been wondering: what are my chances? Do I keep waiting for Mr.Right to come along? Has he already? Did I already blow my chance? (Sometimes it really feels that way.) Or is the whole concept screwed up?
Marriage is an institution established by God, between a man and a woman, the purpose of which is several things: as a symbol of the Holy Trinity, and as a pure expression of worship to God. (At least... this is what I've been taught, I haven't done the Bible study myself as of yet.) Assuming that this is true, you could correlate it to other forms of worship. We certainly don't always feel like doing it. We certainly feel like making bad choices and wrong decisions, but when you choose not to, that is still an act of worship through obedience. Now let's transfer this idea to relationships.
Say I have a boyfriend. I think he's very good looking. I like hanging out with him and I enjoy physical aspects of our relationship. We can confide in each other and be honest with each other. There are some things about him that I dislike, but I can tolerate. We're there for each other. Basically we have a good friendship.
But there's something missing... I love him and am committed to him, but I'm not in love with him as we would define it. I don't get weak in the knees, I don't think about him day and night, I'm not even inspired to write music for him. When I realize this, I feel like I'm at a crossroads. I can either
1.) Break up with him based on the belief that marriage wouldn't work out because I'm not in love.
2.)I can continue to pursue the relationship and eventually marry him, believing that I can grow and learn to be with him forever.
Which is the right choice?"
Dearest, I wish I had the answers to your questions. the cure to your worries and the solutions to your problems. or even so, crease out the frowning lines on your forehead everytime she drives you crazy but hey, guess what, I am 7 hours flight away - on a different continent seperated from your continent by a very huge and deep ocean. So while you bang out all your teeth and smashed you knuckles raw against the wall..I just want you to know, that I will always always be close by listening - allowing the telecommunications company to regale silly at my 6 feet long phone bill at the end of the month. :) I'll be there for you rain or shine...this is my promise to you! Though it might be very difficult to decipher what you are trying to say without the teeth and it might hurt to hold the phone too long with broken fingers - :p Silly!!
