I bumped into my Sunday date and his parents this afternoon during lunch. Doesn't this guy has to work?!! Oh it's lunch time, my intelligence finally spoke. So talk about serendipity - Ahh, it makes me heart flutters a little. God finally, FINALLY is turning my kismet around. A girl is allow to dream. Since I was alone, he invited me to join the 3 of them. I was reluctant at first because 1.) I am too shy; 2.) it feels awkward and 3.) I eat very very slow. However after some cajoling I acquiesced and settled down into the seat next to him, ordered my food and subjected myself to an hour of impromptu interview for position of the date's family's future daughter in law.
Besides checking my vital statistics and making mental checks of my potential in bearing them a healthy grandson, they are very, and I mean it truly from the bottom of my heart, lovely folks. His mum's eyes twinkle and light up everytime she smiles and his dad has a hearty laugh and deep voice that reminds me so much of Santa. It felt a little like the holiday season being around them. my "future-in-laws" (FIL) were two goodlooking couple. Warmth and sweet. I noticed how "future-daddy-in-law" will put his hands over "future-mummy-in-law" once in awhile and give it a gentle squeeze. Signs of a healthy and loving relationship! exactly what I am looking for in my own relationship. Even when I am 60, wrinkly with yellow teeth and snowy white hair, hubby will still hold my hand, look into my eyes and tell me, I still look 21 and more beautiful than he can ever remember. Evergreen in his eyes. A girl can dream...she sure can! I am delirious.
Communication is vital in every relationship. Toss in the nice car he drives and the charming smile, I am going back for sure to pray for God's blessings to walk down the Aisle. I have always been weary and on red alert in my previous relationship. Sure, we talked, we laughed and we shared except we didn't communicate. I try very hard not to play the blame game when it all ended but it was very hard to share your fears, your dreams, your hopes with someone whom you cannot trust, who isn't truthful, who isn't communicating with me. Simply put, communication breaks down over 2 oceans and 3 thousand miles. I only discover many things too late. To be able to open up with someone, I believe you have to trust the other person. And to know you are loved by the other, then only you can trust. If you don't know God loves you, how can you trust in Him that the best is reserve for you? And if you don't trust Him, why even bother trying to communicate with him? Then when communication lines are cut out, there is no relationship to brag about. period.
During one of our numerous chat sessions, I discovered the Date has read the 5 love languages by Gary Chapman. Discovery channel is amazing!! So not only does he speak the Queen's English, he can speak my love language too. I am too opinionated and outspoken for a girl sometimes. The closet american used to snicker at me, " A woman has a 25000 word limit per day. You have 300000". Its good to have a sparring partner at times. No, I am not a fight picker. It is just healthy debate, mind bogging questions and constructive bantering. Something I enjoyed with the Date - I can be myself. Not having to try too hard, not getting tongue-tie, no twirling of my hair, no false pretense and above all else, no need to be afraid.
The Date shared a profound thought with me last sunday which I forgot to mention, he said, "sometimes, no one is right or wrong. just speak the truth with love and grace and seek always to reconcile, never to burn bridges".
Maybe that's why I am agreeing to join the FIL for a durian feast outing this weekend...maybe I just want to try to cross the bridge this time with a little more faith.
